[mr_mitm]

And what's the lesson for parents? Can it be counter productive to praise your child a lot?

[hengheng]

Don't just reward your child for being smart.

Reward them for listening, integrating, being nice towards others, relaxed, comfortable, flourishing, in their lane

[ajuc]

Praise the effort not the result. And especially don't make it into identity of the child.

Best: good job studying for that exam.

Meh: good job passing that exam.

Worst: you so smart, everything comes easy to you.

[1auralynn]

The answer here is actually teach them to self-evaluate, e.g. What do you think about your drawing? Should we hang it up?

Got this from Steve Peters: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steve_Peters_(psychiatrist)