[FirmwareBurner]

>Sounds like he was neuro divergent and his wife made him keep his obsession in the basement.

Men do noting but chill: "They're losers, incels, etc".

Men have cool hobbies that don't bother anyone: "They're neurodivergent".

Men just can't catch a break these days.

[pwdisswordfishz]

And my favourite, "Men will literally [do anything creative] instead of going to therapy". Apparently the proper way to to deal with your feelings is consumerism.

[somewhereoutth]

If Men have the time and opportunity to do nothing but chill, or to have cool hobbies, then they are very definitely catching a break.

[em-bee]

or maybe they are so overwhelmed that they are procrastinating. the problem here is expectations. you have the expectation that one should not chill or focus on a hobby when they should be looking for a job, or spend time with their children, or whatever else they could be doing when they don't chill or work on their hobby.

i know that feeling. i have been there. more than a year out of work, i could not focus on anything, whatever i did felt wrong because i thought i should use that time to apply to jobs. it was exhausting, and i was procrastinating a lot. i had to remind myself that i could not be writing job applications all day, and i used my hobbies to relax and get energy. so no, chilling or having cool hobbies are not a sign of someone catching a break. not without knowing more about their actual circumstances.

[somewhereoutth]

My point is that many people do not have the time and opportunity.

[em-bee]

the problem is that people who slack off or do their hobbies when they should be doing something more important are worse off than those who are just busy. saying they are catching a break is like saying that an alcoholic is catching a break because they got the money to buy alcohol. or (from my perspective) if you have time for tv, youtube and tiktok you must be catching a break, because i don't.

the problem is the generalization. sure, when you catch a break then you can afford to slack off or do your hobbies. but the reverse conclusion is not true. not everyone who is slacking off is catching a break.

it's this judgement of people that when they do that it must be because they are well off that bothers me.

i faced this multiple times. when i grew up we lived on welfare but we could afford things that other people could not because we were thrifty and we saved money on other things we didn't need but were common otherwise, like a car and a TV. but because we were able to afford certain things people thought we were better off. i had time for my hobbies because i didn't spend time watching tv.

they were measuring my life through their perspective.

the same goes for hobbies and hence, your statement.

[FirmwareBurner]

They why are they being berated for what they do with their private lives?

[potato3732842]

Because a certain subset of society feels entitled to tell other people what to do with their time and resources.

"Nobody needs.." and all that.