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by PorterBHall
371 days ago
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Personally, becoming a dad was the single best thing that ever happened to me. I haven’t loved every minute of it, but it added abundant love and purpose to my life and gave me what I didn’t know I needed. My only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner. But I’ve been lucky in this regard. I was deeply conflicted going into it. But all of that doubt left me the moment I first held him in my arms. I don’t know if circumstances were different whether I would’ve had the same experience. And the scariest part about becoming a parent is that there’s no way for you to try it out. I had been an uncle for decades before becoming a parent. Those experiences are not the same. The choice to become a parent, or to not become a parent, is one of those choices in life that requires a leap of faith. There’s no way to explore the counter factual. But, for those of you on the fence, let me say this. We all come from a long line of parents. I believe that there are certain rewards placed in our brain by evolution that are only unlocked by becoming a parent. Nothing can help you understand your parents and the love you did or didn’t receive from them quite like loving your own child. |
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No, it requires sticking one's gonads inside another's gonads and agitating briefly, during a not-rare selection window.
We don't come from a long line of voluntary parents. I had zero of them, directly.
I still agree that being a parent is an amazing, life-transforming event that has gigantic potential upsides. But it also has gigantic potential downsides, including financial ruin, lifelong misery, and/or sudden death (for at least one of the parents).
All I'm saying is: most of our ancestors didn't choose anything when they rubbed cloacae.