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by munificent
381 days ago
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> And because I'm so slow it takes too much time for me to not think that it's a waste of time because I could have done something more meaningful instead. I struggle with this too, especially because knitting is so slow and I'm in the unusual but fortunate position of having my other hobby (writing a couple of books) clearly having had much more impact. There's a part of my brain when I knit that's like, "You know if you spent this hour working on another book, it would leave a bigger mark in the world." But I also know that part of that impulse is unhealthy. I wrote those books for a lot reasons, many of which were good. But some of that drive did come from a sense that I'm not enough just being me and I need to be making something of value for as many people as possible to consider myself worthy. I'm trying to grow out of that mindset and accept myself just as I am. So I consider time spent knitting as sort of exposure therapy for getting used to the idea that I deserve to take time for my selfish joys. |
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