[BSDobelix]

>>I live by myself in a remote mountain cave

= I live in California, and the nearest Starbucks is more than 20 miles away.

>>can only be contacted during a full moon

= As a night person, I am awake when the streetlight outside my house turns on.

>>certain arcane rites that are too horrible to speak of

= In order to contact me, you must install Microsoft Teams.

Overall, it's not that bad, except for the MS team thing. ;)

[bubblyworld]

The man is south african, we are geologically blessed and have a lot of pleasant remote mountain caves =)

[BSDobelix]

Okay, I will revert everything. The cave, the moon, and the rituals are all real. It's impressive how much reality is based on location :-)

[bubblyworld]

That's the spirit!

[awanderingmind]

True!

I don't literally live in a cave, but fortunately not everyone is so allergic to whimsical language :D.

[Chris2048]

The moon thing might still not be literal, similar to "once in a blue moon" i.e. rarely.