[impendia]

Take this with a grain of salt, because I'm an academic, not an entrepreneur.

That said: when I was younger, being a nerd was uncool. To out yourself as one was to take a social risk, and it makes sense that tight-knit communities formed.

These days, entrepreneurship and the tech industry have acquired something of a social cachet -- perhaps because there's boatloads of money in it now. I've read that "geek nights" have attracted a bunch of hangers-on, who like to talk big but haven't necessarily invested their time into learning anything difficult.

Whether fairly or not, you're probably being taken for such a person.

I've been in an analogous situation, and it sucked. I feel for you. That said, to echo what others have said -- if you're going to try to make cold contacts like this, you probably need to either lead with a specific request, or else approach in such a way that makes it clear that you're bringing something interesting to the table.