[jon-wood]

I think there's a degree to which this is true, I wouldn't walk into an interview and immediately start slagging off my old employer, but if you're interviewing me and get all worked up when I say bad things about them in answer to the question "why are you leaving your current job" that's on you and I won't regret not getting the job.

[CGMthrowaway]

That's your choice. It's not a bad idea to answer "why are you leaving your current job" with "i'm looking for greater opportunities to [the opposite of why you are leaving your job]" and people can read between the lines AND have less of the concerns they would if you went guns blazing on the bridges behind you

[pm90]

You can be honest about why your previous employer wasn’t the right fit without burning bridges. I really dislike all of this “reading between the lines” aren’t Americans supposed to be direct?

[mrsilencedogood]

No, American big business talking heads are supposed to be direct. American workers are supposed to be demure, grateful to have health insurance, and slot perfectly into the cog slot they've been assigned. Someone who openly criticizes their former employer is showing they have opinions and will resist being mistreated. I mean, showing they're not a team player.

Companies would much rather miss out on growth than have employees who have any kind of leverage over them.

[int_19h]

> I really dislike all of this “reading between the lines” aren’t Americans supposed to be direct?

You're talking about a culture in which the standard greeting is "How are you?", and the standard response to said greeting is, "I'm fine!" - even when you're obviously not fine.

So, no, it's very much not direct. If you want to see what a "direct" software engineering culture looks like, look at Eastern Europe. There, people will routinely say things like "this code is crap", and no-one (including the author of said code!) bats an eye at it because it's supposed to be taken at face value, not as an insult.

[sh34r]

Eastern Europeans and Israelis are so refreshing to work with.

[aianus]

Similar to goblin mode in dating you should 100% be yourself but only if you already have money and don't particularly need a given job. This works best when you already have a job.

You want the shitty PHB megacorps to reject you so you don't win to lose by getting a job you are going to hate.

[Wonnk13]

I'm not sure I actually want to know, but what the hell is "goblin mode"?

[underlipton]

It's a Tuesday. You crawl out of bed. You don't brush your teeth, you don't take a shower, you don't do your hair, you don't even really get dressed. You grab a piece of cake or a pretzel or something from the fridge, climb under a blanket in whatever room your TV is in, and binge Star Wars content for the next 5 hours. Your boyfriend watches a portion of this from the kitchen table, sipping his coffee. Goblin mode.

[CGMthrowaway]

Goblin mode as a consultant is charging whatever high price will make you want to work on a project, not doing sales, only answering the phone when and for whom you want, and letting your work speak for itself.

[dontlikeyoueith]

> I really dislike all of this “reading between the lines” aren’t Americans supposed to be direct?

Only when talking to people beneath them. When talking to your superiors, you should be deferential and circumspect.

American society is more hierarchical than a feudal aristocracy. It's just based on money, skin color, and gender instead of family name.

[underlipton]

Well, it's family name, too. You're just forgiven somewhat if you're outside the community and don't know which family is supposed to be given deference. Unless you're talking to a family of cops or the family that owns everything in the area, in which case you immediately agree with whatever political opinion they share (loudly).

[sh34r]

From Philly to Boston, you got a lot of direct Americans, but the rest of the country? No, not really. West Coasters might be the most passive-aggressive people in the world.

[BeetleB]

I don't work for people who want me to read between the lines.

And bosses who read between my lines? Terrible.

Read some communications book. Reading between the lines and using tact are the (literal) textbook cases of poor communicators.

[tasuki]

Are you suggesting lying? I'd rather say the truth. I'm sure you'll be more successful at getting the job.

[ahmeneeroe-v2]

This is the part of the interview where they seeking to understand your maturity and discretion. The actual reason for leaving is not the right answer. An answer showing that you understand social norms and have great self restraint is the right answer.

[ponector]

That part of the interview is a bunch of bullshit questions and socially acceptable answers from both sides. It is simply to check is candidate agrees to play the game by the rules.

Why are you looking for a new job? Because I have a dickhead manager and looking for a higher salary. But my answer will be I'm looking for new challenges, for opportunity to grow.

Both sides are telling lies during the interview.