[geebee]

I said earlier that I never field a call at the table. That isn't completely true. I (discretely, I hope) noticed that the green light was flashing, and I went outside to listen to the message, because it was from an unlisted number and like you I have kids, one in school, one in daycare.

I guess the big difference is that I don't say "deal with it". I actually felt I owed my colleagues a quick explanation and apology.

Think of how different the reaction would have been if instead of writing this:

"If I am at dinner and I decide that I want to keep on top of my device (I have four children and a very busy professional life), those with me have to deal with it. Most of the time my phone is more important than the discardable conversation happening over a meal."

you'd written something like this instead:

"Because I have four children and I want to be reachable in an emergency, I do keep an eye on my phone and occasionally take a call outside. But I try to do this in a way that minimizes the disruption to the people at the table. I hope that people can understand the distinction between putting your phone on the table and fielding casual conversations."

People are generally pretty nice and understanding if you're respectful rather than telling them to deal with it.