[rawgabbit]

I have some experience with this and your take is a bit uncharitable. I am classified as a senior citizen and am relatively healthy. My MIL is 86 years old, has dementia, fallen several times and broken her hip, shoulders etc. She is tiny; but when I try to lift her up by myself...it is almost impossible. I tell her to grab my shoulders while I face her and cradle her butt with my hands and do my best to stand up straight imitating the squat exercise I do on a daily basis. Even when I do manage to get her off the ground, she complains I should have done it more slowly. I don't bother replying, because she has dementia. She falls because she refuses to use her walker. When reminded to always have the walker, she is very argumentative. Extremely argumentative.

The good thing is that we were able to keep her in own home and get her on medicaid. She had exhausted all of her funds already. Medicaid pays for a nurse to check on her weekly. Medicaid also pays for "attendant services" to remind her to take her medication, get in and out of the shower, and keep the house presentable. A charity and my wife brings prepared meals that the attendant heats up. My MIL is a handful. She is abusive to everyone, screaming/shouting/argumentative non-stop, and quickly forgets what she just said.

We know one day, we will have to send her to a nursing home where they will likely sedate her with meds. We are trying to keep her in own home. And she argues about that as well. We actually had a one month argument where she demanded to be sent to a nursing home. When we told her that the one she named was cited for abusing patients, she kept arguing.

[howard941]

Get a Hoyer Lift - it should be covered by hospice. And speaking of hospice, consider it. With dementia she'll be approved. The Hoyer Lift will make moving her about much easier.