[dangus]

I feel like this comment and the article itself together in context have kind of a sour taste for me.

Just the fact that it takes such a great effort to experience first-hand how poorer people just help each other out because nobody has money, so they help. But for a tech bro to do that they have to engage in a self-indulgent hobby and cosplay as poor like they're on Undercover Boss.

Ironically this effort to relate to other real live humans with normal incomes is only possible by indulging in the ultimate luxury, which is taking major time off of work rather than being stuck working a shit job.

This is all done with a straight face while jamming a sentence full of words like "paraglider" and "packrafting."

This whole subject is all so stereotypical tech bro in such an unappealing way.

Maybe this sounds unnecessarily bitter, but I think a valid alternate take on this is that privileged people are taking advantage of the kindness of others to get a bunch of help they don't need to help them achieve a goal that is a frivolous luxury. It's great we all get to feel warm fuzzy gratitude but it seems like the NPCs in this main character syndrome story are the people inconvenienced by the OP.

Example: asking the fire department for a place to sleep, they probably feel bad so they let OP sleep in the fire department. But as a tech startup founder and software engineer, OP could have almost certainly afforded a basic motel each night with minimal to zero planning and effort and not resorted to inconveniencing other people.

It feels a little bit like your CEO going to the food bank doesn't it? The median firefighter earns under $60k and dude who has probably outearns that salary in passive investment income is asking for a place to crash. I bet if the firefighter knew that they'd surely still be nice on the outside but they'd probably have a negative story to tell their spouse when they got home.

I completely understand that not booking a motel facilitated human connection and all that loveliness but I sense that the benefit is very one-sided. In Zuckerberg-esque style, the tech bro gets to cosplay as a human with real emotions, while on the "normie NPC" side they get to deal with a tech bro on a bicycle asking for weird shit while they're just trying to get through a shift.

[jaxtracks]

I agree that availing yourself of other people's charity for the sake of gaining a novel experience is gross if they have no way to decline or you're misrepresenting your circumstances. I think you've got a poorly adjusted take on the level of imposition happening in the situations described here though.

When I thumb a ride with a boat over my shoulder, nobody has to stop, and I'm sure nobody feels too bad for the dummy who might have to walk all afternoon because he decided to huck a river without a shuttle plan. When the author crashes at a fire-house, my hunch is the chief isn't worried that if he declines then the guy who's been camping for most of his trip anyway is going to freeze to death. Maybe he's just stoked to do someone a solid and chitchat with a traveler on a slow night. These are not 'CEO at a foodbank' type situations.

If I go on a mission to yoink a boater out of a gnarly river, I never hear anyone on my S&R crew worrying over whether the subject could have afforded a guided trip instead. We're just happy to help, and hope they learn from the experience. I think people legitimately enjoy helping eachother out more than you assume here, and are probably less concerned with economic status of the recipient than you.

> Ironically this effort to relate to other real live humans with normal incomes is only possible by indulging in the ultimate luxury, which is taking major time off of work rather than being stuck working a shit job.

So what do you advocate for here? Growing the increasing cultural isolation between economic classes because those lucky enough to afford time off work should be so concerned with potentially imposing that they shamefully avoid putting themselves in situations where they could benefit from the help of someone less well off?

Wealth inequality is a huge problem, and I'm excusing the level of salt in your comment because I agree with your general theme that exploitation of that dynamic is bad. But it feels like you're attacking a harmless treatment because you're upset the disease exists in the first place.

[dangus]

I don't think those who are helping OP feel imposed upon, but that doesn't mean that they aren't imposed upon.

I totally agree that people are happy to help regardless of circumstance. And I'm not trying to compare OP to Jeff Bezos or anything. But I think it still feels a little too much like cosplaying, metaphorically comparing camping in a tent to being similar to being homeless.

What do I advocate for? I would advocate for people who have the means to think about how they are impacting other people and trying not to artificially introducing situations where they need help from the less fortunate, and the situation where OP asked local first responders for help finding a place to stay was a great example of a problematic interaction.

[jaxtracks]

> I don't think those who are helping OP feel imposed upon, but that doesn't mean that they aren't imposed upon.

So I think what you're saying here that even if the request is not unwelcome, it may still be unfair? That's for the person offering their help to decide for themselves. I would be absolutely bewildered if someone on the internet decided I was being exploited because I stopped to help a rich guy change his tire.

> But I think it still feels a little too much like cosplaying, metaphorically comparing camping in a tent to being similar to being homeless.

I'm a pretty offline dude so I don't grasp the full context behind 'cosplaying' here, but if you're suggesting that anyone sleeping in a tent thinks they are going through the same struggle as a homeless person then that's a huge leap my friend. You can simultaneously appreciate your fortunate placement in the socioeconomic hierarchy, and participate in pursuits that will at least give you a bit of sympathy for how bad it can suck to sleep in the cold.

> What do I advocate for? I would advocate for people who have the means to think about how they are impacting other people and trying not to artificially introducing situations where they need help from the less fortunate, and the situation where OP asked local first responders for help finding a place to stay was a great example of a problematic interaction.

How is this problematic exactly? I've worked with lots of small town fire depts doing S&R and disaster relief and they are typically pretty broadly serving public servants, accustomed to fielding, and declining all sorts of odd requests. I don't think there's any risk at all asking a fire chief about places to stay is exploitation.

I totally understand why, at a shallow level, someone with money benefiting from the aid of someone without grosses you out, but my concern with your view here is that you're asking folks with means to tiptoe around society, being careful not to exploit to the point that interacting with their communities in very normal and fair ways is 'problematic'. The well off can do a lot of good in their communities, but this doesn't tend to happen if they feel isolated outside the circle of giving that other folks enjoy. Crested Butte Colorado is a great example of this, where lots of new moneyed people have moved into town, but are too timid to integrate. Instead of contributing, they add more rarely used bedrooms onto their mcmansions, and vote against affordable housing.

Rich kids flock to burning man in part because they are stoked give and receive in a communal model. I think if they realized real life is more like that then they think, they'd probably be more helpful to those around them.

[giantg2]

If you have to go out of your way to have a humble experience and then blog about it, then it's not authentic and you don't really know.

[_rpxpx]

Agreed. This sort of article does convey a lot about the mental world of the tech bro. Apart from the surprise at the hospitality of "normal people" it has the glassy sheen of purely procedural mind. I mean, one is not exactly swept away by the sense of adventure. It's a sort of fitness exercise.