[countessa]

I'm in a similar situation - comfortable full time job - though I've been developing my side projects pretty well for about a year and they bring in a nice side income at this point. Basically, I follow the rule of 3 - set 3 goals per week, per month and per year. I use Sundays to plan my week - I take about 30 minutes to decide what 3 things I want to achieve in the week. Usually, given I don't get a lot of time to code in the evening, I set small goals - for example: create a custom table view cell, refactor a piece of code, sketch out an algorithm to do x. Then I check in at the end of the week to see how I'm doing.

Given family and work commitments, as well as seeing friends occasionally, careful planning is really necessary. Try out a few methods and see what works for you.