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by em-bee
474 days ago
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you are right of course. in part what i am struggling with is prioritization. apart from needing time to take care of my children i find it hard to focus on any side project when the constant inability to find work is looming over me. this is exacerbated by the fact that a recent theft while traveling caused a rather large financial loss, cutting my savings in half, so that i now only have a few months left before i am broke, living as an expat without social security support. if i run out of money i'd have to go back to where i am from, and disrupt not only my own network of friends and relationships that i have been able to develop, but even worse that of my children who not only will have to switch school but also do so in a new language that they only have a passive understanding of. what i am trying to say is that life will not only be hard, as that would be bearable. i am used to hard times. but the effect would be a very dramatic upheaval, and that is paralyzing. a few months is barely enough time to learn something new just to help me find work. (and i only identified go and react as prominent skills in job descriptions very recently too. a few months ago would not even have known what is worth learning). if i focus on learning now i am almost certain to fail to find work by the time money runs out. i do have plenty of experience, if i could only find an employer or customer who can recognize that. (ps: this comment may sound defensive, but it isn't. i am trying to elaborate and clarify and i do invite readers here to find the flaws in my argumentation and point out alternatives. i am commenting here so i can learn and improve) |
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