And anyway, official dictionaries are largely historical records, not authoritative sources for living languages. Words mean what people who use them intend them to mean.
By your definition of dictionary. Again, words mean what people who use them intend them to mean. Urban Dictionary and Wiktionary are both dictionaries as far as I'm concerned.
The digressions started with the first mention of the term in question by SSLy, not just the descriptor you mentioned. That user was probably pointlessly baiting, knowing that the nonstandard term would set someone off, which has led to the digressions that followed.
I've been using that term on and off. This was the first time someone came forward saying it's incorrect. I don't disagree with your assessment of my intentions, but it wasn't that usage, it was the politics part.
It's not.
Anyone can put anything in Urban Dictionary, c'mon. Nobody said no one has uttered the term before.
If something is "often used", it winds up in dictionaries, with a lag of only a few years.