As someone pondering the exact same sentiment of "I like women so much that I kinda want to be one" but who hasn't fully committed to it yet, I really appreciated your vulnerability and lucid writing. I hope folks are kind here in the comments.
> It took me a while to remove my facial hair, I still haven’t trained my voice.
The facial hair removal really does take forever, it's so annoying :sob:. And I've found voice training (particularly around other people) to be really intimidating. I wish you the best of luck if you decide to pursue it!
I came out socially for most of a year before I committed to hormones, and it took me another year and a half to commit to removing my facial hair. At some point it really is a leap of faith. But you can do a lot of exploring and trying things out until you feel comfortable – or decide it's not really what you want.
I seem to be going in the opposite order lol—I've been getting my facial hair removed for almost a year now, but am only barely starting to become comfortable with the idea of actually transitioning. And if I did transition, I think I'd likely only come out socially to a very small group of people until I'd also transitioned hormonally! Perhaps my priorities are all backwards...
I read your linked post and enjoyed it—I've heard vaguely similar sentiments expressed before by some of my trans friends. It's like that RuPaul quote: "We're all born naked, and the rest is drag."
I hope you have a nice day, and thank you for the well-wishes :)
I found your post extremely touching and humanizing. We need more of these perspectives right now that highlight the complex feelings of lived experiences. This is literally what makes us human, and has the potential to reach people in ways that polemic does not (which is not to say polemic isn't important). Thanks for sharing.
Beautiful writing. I also read pg's essay and was also upset. Just know there are cis men like me who are on your side and hate where tech is going. The bigotry being out in the open is disturbing.
> It took me a while to remove my facial hair, I still haven’t trained my voice.
The facial hair removal really does take forever, it's so annoying :sob:. And I've found voice training (particularly around other people) to be really intimidating. I wish you the best of luck if you decide to pursue it!
Take care, OP.