| The first change you can make is speak with zero first-person pronouns. Banish "I" and "me" from your vocabulary. Practice that beforehand. The surefire way to seem boring is to be in your own head all the time. The only time you should be "inside your head" during a conversation is to achieve point #1 above. "Hmm, how can I say this next thought without "I" or "me"? Otherwise, you should be mentally projecting yourself out of your head into their story. Try to make 90% of the conversation about them. Even if you are boring, you can seem interesting just by telling someone about themselves. To "hype" yourself for conversations, you need to tell yourself "I'm going to talk to this person specifically to envision myself in their story, feeling what they feel." Lastly, some people tend to be very "tunnel vision" in conversations. It makes people seem really bland, stiff, transactional. It's much more fun to remind yourself before a conversation that "it's cool to see if I can identify small gestures or body language to get "more insight" into the person." Which means to look around, look at the person. Related to the above, being able to gesture with hands, feet, and body convey a certain "relaxed-ness". If you are back inside your own head, use that as a chance to tell yourself to move your hands, gesture, etc. when talking. |