| So, your query is only about informal conversational speech. That’s tougher to master because it’s not about the speech at all but rather its almost exclusively about deference and dominance. First, let’s be clear that some people are just sociopaths and assholes. If you were only speaking to empaths that listen well and deeply cared for your contributions in their entirety this problem would almost never arise and would be an accident when it does arise. So, let’s just focus on the assholes. People interrupt you for typically selfish reasons, because they stopped listening to you want just want to hear their own voice out loud. That could be due to impatience, possibly autism or ADHD, or it could be because they don’t value you. This is especially tough when it comes from people that love you. 1. The most immediate solution is to dominate with assertiveness. When somebody cuts you off call it out. Be confrontational and directly identify the problem and that you don’t like it. This doesn’t have be impolite but must be firm and immediate. This will solve the problem most of the time because the person cutting you is probably unaware of their behavior, how you feel, and has probably done this to you multiple times in the past. If the person challenges you then remain firm without excuses. Most people aren’t prepared for confrontation and will back off, but if they are an asshole the only goal is to embarrass them in public. You don’t need to embarrass them as their behavior will speak for itself. You just need to remain firm without excuses or compromise. 2. If you are squeezed out of conversation by people that aren’t listening you can always walk away. If you walk away and nobody notices then they were never listening to you in the first place. Any attempt to interject yourself will be a Pyrrhic victory that wastes your energy and erodes your credibility unless your goal is to start a fight. This is especially true in echo chambers. If you walk away and somebody does notice it’s on them to determine what’s of higher value: you or the group. Let them own that choice. Later it’s up to you how to handle that, but you must handle it or let yourself continue to be a doormat. 3. Be aggressive. This always works but rarely in a positive way. I really recommend saving this as a last case scenario. When this happens if your first response is to punch someone in the face other people around you will get the message but at the same time nobody will want to engage with you. You are too intimidating and if you are not prepared for a fight could get your ass kicked if they are equally aggressive. But, this always works. As an example I recommend a movie called The Green Book. |