[nerdjon]

There is a middle ground, and I agree that there are some people that have gone too far.

I think body positivity, validating those choices with models that represent more people is a good thing. As a society we should not be judging someone for their choices or making medical claims about their bodies when we don't know their story.

But I also see the extremes of just ignoring it, not even wanting your doctor to talk about it. (I do realize that there are some exceptions to this like when it comes to eating disorders) I don't understand this. I want my doctor to tell me everything, hell I will overshare in the hopes that something is a thing that needs to be addressed.

I have also personally seen a subset of people that push back on anyone wanting to loose weight. I have lost about 45 lbs over the last year (still not at my target weight but I am very close, about 5-10 lbs off so really not stressing and for context I am 6'5). A friend I have not seen in a while recently gave me a hug, commented that I was loosing weight and asked me "Why". I was put off by it, because why is that even a question? You would get mad if I asked why you were gaining weight.

My point here, there is a middle ground and there is a right and wrong place to address this. Society shaming someone isn't the right choice and ignores that we don't know what is really going on with someone.

[UweSchmidt]

As usual it comes down to the increasing individualism, that rejects any overarching societal guidance in favour of judgement-free self-expression ("body positivity"). This removes any collective bargaining or collective action (some of which I proposed in my parent comment) and exposes the individual to systemic risks (food industry making people fat, medical industry giving them a pill to feel better), unless the individual is equipped with enough of Bourdieu's social capital to navigate the pervasive health risks of the modern food supply. Allowing this minefield in place is also a convenient way to maintain class, leaving the unwashed masses hampered by health issues (like diabetes), reduced cognitive function and less attractiveness.

[throwaway756544]

> I think body positivity, validating those choices with models that represent more people is a good thing. As a society we should not be judging someone for their choices or making medical claims about their bodies when we don't know their story.

I’m slightly overweight and an ex-smoker. For years, nothing seemed to help me quit—high taxes, indoor smoking bans, health risks, and so on didn’t diminish my desire to smoke. I tried quitting a few times for financial and health reasons, but it never stuck.

What ultimately got me to quit was social stigma, especially after having kids. The stigma around smoking has grown over the years, but it reaches another level when you become a parent. Other parents didn’t hesitate to judge me for smoking, and I realized there was no way my kids wouldn’t face social consequences because of my habit. That was the push I needed to quit.

I do believe it’s wrong to judge people for their choices, but at the same time, I sometimes wonder if we’re going too far with body positivity. I don’t have all the answers, but I’m grateful for the stigma surrounding smoking—it helped me make a positive change.

[didibus]

I know a few people who lost weight and got super fit out of body positivity movements.

In general, the body positivity movement I've seen is about respect, encouragement, and support. It's not about encouraging bad habits, but being inviting to those who feel ashamed and would normally avoid going to the gym, a dance class, or to ask advice about healthy eating, etc.

[didibus]

> not even wanting your doctor to talk about it

There's been a lot of misdiagnosis due to doctors just thinking it's a weight issue. I think that's one of the reason people have an issue with doctor's handling of weight.

The other area is that it often ignores that the patient is already actively aware, and trying to combat their weight gain. The doctors are not being helpful by just stating the obvious.

Lastly, many doctors are kind of outdated in their knowledge, they'll recommend old diets that are not as effective anymore, or they won't encourage exercise, just diet, or they won't consider family history, and so on.

In those cases, your "doctor bringing it up" can actually just lead to more weight gain, because it can create increased cortisol level from stress and worries, make you more depressed, and so on, which won't help you lose weight.

[nerdjon]

I agree that what you're saying is a problem but if your doctor is not handling anything about your health properly why are you not finding a new doctor instead of saying you don't want to talk about something?

And I am not saying that your doctor needs to constantly bring it up, but at a yearly physical I would expect that anything that could be contributing to other issues or my health in general would be brought up no matter how many times it was brought up. There are exceptions to this that I would generally expect the doctor to know and you not needing to ask it.

I mean replace weight with any other thing that could (not saying it's easy or possible for everyone) change and it sounds ridiculous. I cannot imagine a doctor respecting being asked, I don't want to talk about me smoking. Or sitting all day for work, or other risky behavior. It's all part of your entire health picture.

[didibus]

I think it's a matter of tact, that not all doctor will have equally. How they approach the topic, how compassionate they are when doing so, and how much they pester you about it.