[bluecoconut]

Worrying what others think resonates with me a lot. Every few weeks I try to motivate myself to write more online (HN, X, blogs) and consistently get “self sabotage” stuck. (Been going on for >2 years)

The article just says they pushed through and “put it aside”, but that has never seemed to quite work for me. I can push through once or twice, not enough to build a daily habit/obsession like I want.

Anyone have any tips that worked for getting over this hurdle?

[sshine]

> Anyone have any tips that worked for getting over this hurdle?

Since nobody suggested this:

Write for yourself, locally. This removed my writer's block.

After writing for myself for about a year, I blogged consistently for two years.

I've since lost the kadence and want to get back to it, but now priorities have come in the way.

Now I usually write for my local tech community.

I know there's a dozen people who like to learn things if there's an easy way. That motivates me a lot

There's another hurdle of having a clear idea of the target audience; when you're the target audience, it gets a little fuzzy. So it has helped me to think of either "what I'd like to read 6 months from now if I had to learn this after partially forgetting it". Or someone else concrete I'm not actually obligated to share my writing with. Just so I can aim my writing better.

[bluecoconut]

I write for myself a lot, roughly ~5000 words a day in notes, messages to self, etc. I have no problem writing and talking to myself.

It's the editing process and formalizing it for public consumption.

Either, the actual work of doing the cleanup feels too labor intensive, or I've already moved onto the next obsession, and am chasing that new idea.

Do you have a process for turning the local writing into more public writing?

[kccqzy]

I think what blurs the line between local writing and public writing is that you just publish it after minimal editing with no fanfare. No RSS feeds for people to subscribe to. No posting on HN or Reddit where plenty of people are judgmental. Just make it public. If people chance upon it let them read it; just don't purposefully attract people to read it.

[swapxstar]

That’s really cool that you can write like that, I would really like to know more about how and what you mean by write for myself writing.

Can you share more about what you write?

[james_marks]

At the risk of sounding LLM-obsessed, this sounds like a great use-case for Claude.

Even when your input is incoherent, it’s often enough to get the AI in the right direction, and then it’s easier to edit.

[pas]

well, it is work. quite a lot!

when you feel you want to "write more online" what do you want? why do you want to write online? do you want to participate in some discourse? understand a topic, do a deep dive? communicate something? do you want fiction or non-fiction writing?

[imtringued]

Unless you are writing a book nobody cares. Even if you have a beautifully written blog post, people will forget about it the day after, or next week or next month. They won't remember any details. Just don't make any jarring mistakes like grammar or abrupt jumps.

Even if you intend to write a book, you should just treat your blog as a bunch of notes.

[bee_rider]

I have no idea if it will help, but the amount of nitpicking I see when people post things online is much more than the amount of nitpicking I’ve seen in the actual PhD defenses I’ve attended, or the research paper peer reviews I’ve gotten back. Of course, it is always possible that you’ll bump into, like, the one person who has much more experience than most professors in a topic, on the Internet. Alternatively, maybe the professors, being experts, can find the positive contribution in imperfect projects.

[mfscholar]

If you're looking to set up a habit cycle, I'd recommend three steps:

1. Find a cue that will remind you to start writing, e.g. having your morning coffee

2. Write any amount of time; say 30min or so

3. Reward yourself. I just have a little snack, but it could be anything

Works great for me, and I found once I changed some small habits, it was also easier to do better overall. This advice is from the book "The power of habit" by Charles Dhuigg

[detourdog]

My writing prompt is HN. I wait until I see a prompt to respond to.

[matwood]

It took me way too long to realize this but most people don’t think or care about you. I’m not saying this in a bad way, but only worry about those that matter like your family and friends. No one else thinks about you anyway, so don’t preoccupy yourself worrying about what they think.

[adriand]

Also: accept that what you make is ephemeral. No one pauses in the middle of building a sand castle on the beach and wonders if their sand-sculpting skills are adequate. Anything you make, even if it becomes one of humanity’s most cherished works (extremely unlikely!) is not going to be here for very long. So enjoy the process, put it out in the world, and maybe a person or two will appreciate it before the waves wash it away.

[swapxstar]

Yes, I think I am starting to realise that. And that is really helpful in this journey.

[mips_avatar]

I think maybe polish is getting in the way. There's so many really beautiful blog posts out there, well researched, and the author can represent themselves as an expert. But more often than not the really deeply true information I tend to find is a quick little hacker news comment written quickly.

Now a hacker news comment can only contain so much, so sharing your truth a little broader might require some additional medium (graphics, code example, video) but you can clearly articulate yourself well in a HN comment, so maybe think of the blogs as just a little more than a HN comment?

[deathtrader666]

I always remind myself that even the celebrated works supposedly have glaring holes in them. If they can get popular and be cherished, then my work too doesn't have to be "water-tight" at all times.

[imtringued]

Just think about the human batteries in the matrix movie. Anyone who heard that thought the machines were using human brains as biocomputers, but no, they actually insist on the battery explanation.

[hinkley]

Hemingway said once that the trick to getting writing done was to stop writing when you know what happens next.

Other writers have talked about being compelled to write to get an idea out of their head that’s stuck there. I think they’re much the same thing. You’re essentially leaving yourself in that obsessed state until you can sit down again.

If you try to sit down with just a long term goal in mind you’re torturing yourself. And likely creating negative reinforcement of future stuckness. Write the bit in front of you, pause when you have an idea what’s next, not when you run out of steam.

[mch82]

Focus on your docs, code, and blog because they’re under your control. Write for yourself. Write for the people who use your work. Publish smaller chunks of work. Add value to your real network.

X, HN, and other socials are far less important. You have no control over whether the algorithm decides to amplify your content. Most work that’s foundational to society isn’t popular on socials today and won’t ever be. There’s a lottery chance you’ll get picked for amplification. Winning that lottery is great, but playing the lottery is not investing in your future.

[dartos]

I recently started a blog after having the same feeling for years.

What changed for me was accepting that my posts aren’t going to be polished and it’s okay if they don’t front page HN.

I just jot down notes, organize them in an outline and publish it.

I figure eventually, as I feel more comfortable with it, I’ll polish up my posts more and more.

[lancesells]

I've never had much of a fear of not being good enough for others but I've had a fear of not being good enough for myself. I don't know if this will get you over the hurdle but here's what really opened up my work and had me procrastinating less as an artist was:

The act and the process of creating art is what I enjoy. The outcome of that work and sense of accomplishment is fleeting, not that important, and a little out of my hands.

Once I realized this I just make more things, take more chances, and find myself making "better" work than I ever have. So just spend your time doing the thing you like doing. If you don't actually enjoy the process then you probably aren't meant to do it, regardless of the outcome or the accolades.

[tame3902]

> Worrying what others think resonates with me a lot.

- There are lots of blog posts and youtube videos about this topic. Try whether any will help you.

- If you post, go down the rabbit hole of your thoughts. What will happen? Keep going with "and then" as far as possible. Then replace negative thoughts with more positive ones. Those have to be believable and not just blindly positive. E.g. replacing "everybody will hate this" with "a lot of people will hate this, but some will really enjoy it" is already progress.

- As a child, did you have a caregiver or teacher that gave you the feeling that if you make mistakes, they will stop loving you? Make it clear to your adult self that you are deserving of love no matter what.

- Do you have types of writing which are easy for you? No matter the answer, why is that?

- Create something intentionally bad without publishing it, and sit with your bad feelings for a while. Usually that reduces the anxiety.

- If you post something, explore your feelings. Is that like nervousness before an exam, general anxiety or something completely different. This might give you a clue, why you struggle.

- Imagine a friend would come to you with this problem. What advice would you give them? How would you react to something you posted if somebody else wrote it?

- Be kind to yourself. Changing this is a long journey.

[luckydata]

Keep doing it until you get better at it. Not caring about what others think is a skill.

[caseyy]

> Anyone have any tips that worked for getting over this hurdle?

This might give you something to work with: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=42102050. Maybe you're confusing natural and reasonable behaviour with self-sabotage? They look the same from some perspectives (such as perfectionism and people-pleasing).

[hop_n_bop]

The Pomodoro technique works well. Set a timer for 15 minutes, and focus only on your writing for until the timer goes off; or longer if you like.

[bayofpigs]

Love Pomodoro timers so much had AI make an web app to link them together. You can customize and use it here: https://1recipe.com.

[dageshi]

bayofpigs, I feel it necessary to tell you that your account seems to be shadowbanned? Like 80% of your comments have been [dead]/not shown since your account creation in 2013 and as far as I can see there appears to be no good reason for it? The majority of comments in your history seem entirely reasonable.

[e1gen-v]

Do you actually enjoy the process of writing online?

Because for me I’ve realized there’s a difference between enjoying actually doing a hobby versus just fantasizing about what it would be like to be good at it.

Maybe that’s not what you’re experiencing, but I’ve tried to get into hobbies and have run into the feeling you describe. Eventually I would drop the hobby because I just didn’t enjoy doing it.

Ps congrats on writing online :)

[bluecoconut]

I like writing to myself / talking to myself... but I'm trying to convert that internal captured thought / language into brand value and useful information in a wider contexts.

Good points about recognizing the fantasy of doing something vs. the actual work might be part of this.

also, lol meta, thanks!

[swapxstar]

I don’t think I have figured out whether I enjoy the process of writing itself.

But what I know for sure is that I have a lot of thoughts and ideas as well as opinions and the idea of putting them down and expanding upon them really really intrigues me.

I also believe that it will really help grow.

[almatabata]

One thing that helped me was accepting that it is not that I might fail but that I will fail initially.

I will produce bad articles because to become good you have to start with your current skill level which probably sucks if you are average. To become good you have to write. Nothing beats actually doing it. But knowing that everyone published something stupid at some point helps me accept that I will also go through that process as well. Everyone failed, everyone will fail and it is fine to fail.

And no matter how good you become you will still fail from time to time. You never graduate from it. Look at the famous movie directors, writers and journalists. Are all their works great? Is each of their work always better than the previous ones? Of course not. Some works will be amazing and insightful, some might be mediocre. Even the very best will have their ups and downs, so why not you?

Each time I publish a post I already accept it might be subpar.

[phito]

It might be your unconscious deciding that it's not worth doing? Posting things online is rather useless and often brings more negatives than positives.

[Sparkyte]

Sometimes I feel like someone already wrote what I am writing and it doesn't feel good to just work on something I know could be critiqued hard because an alternative exists.

[achempion]

If you need to force yourself to write, why write at all? Did you use any technique to write this comment?

[nox101]

for me it's not fear of being good enough. it's that for me a blog post takes 4 to 20 hours. 4 if it's just text. Write, rewrite, proofread, etc. 20 if I need to draw diagrams or make examples.

if it's just a paragraph of thought then it might as well be on social media

[neofrommatrix]

Does the fear of judgment occur even when you are behind an anonymous username?

[ncr100]

Ask for AI to help be your writing buddy?

Not for content, but for process?

[akomtu]

Write under a pseudonym?

[godelski]

You might be burnt out.

[JumpinJack_Cash]

> > Every few weeks I try to motivate myself to write more online

Bro run! Spending time online is a sign of depression. And even if you are among the few in which this isn't true (which I doubt) talking and writing about stuff way above your head (not in the IQ sense but about stuff you have no control over) will get your there.

[tolerance]

I feel this. Here are some thoughts I've had that have allowed me to toss one leg over the hurdle we share.

* Limit your self-promotion: If you feel unnerved by the criticism of the opaque masses of the internet (e.g. Hacker News) then do not present your work to them. If you absolutely must share your writing with anyone, why not share it with people who you actually know? Rather, don't self-promote at all, share your work with people who embody the readers who you had in mind upon writing it.

Which leads to my next thought...

* Unless you are representing some sort of institution that the public trusts and you are obliged to sustain this trust, why write with the public (read: the opaque masses of the internet) in mind at all. The "reader who you have in mind" while writing is the equivalent of the "dream spouse" who you may have imagined: They just so happen to possess all of the virtues that coincidentally complement your own and all of their faults are can be conveniently managed within your scope of reasoning. The good thing about the reader/writer relationship is that it is inherently polygamous so feel free to write for yourself and for yourself alone and whichever readers fit the description that you have envisaged in your mind to whatever degrees will be drawn to what you have to say accordingly and if it doesn't work out then there's always someone else, somewhere, who fits the description of someone who one way or another is just a kind of living complement to your own personality. Such is I suppose a component of romance in man's sojourn on earth.

The blog posts that inspire me to write the most are the one's that are impersonally personable. Writing that is obviously written by a human being who is sharing their experiences but in a way that is totally indifferent to my own interests. That isn't to say that it comes across as self-absorbed but that it is like the behaviors among children on the school yard. He's playing jacks. He's spinning tops. They're playing four square. They're beating each other into a pulp along the tree lines. But no one's doing so as if they intend for me want to join in.

The blog posts that I find the most boring read as though they presume an audience and are even written in a way that presumes scathing criticism from said audience. A lot writers have become dispossessed of their ability to express themselves in earnest ways because of this. I don't necessarily fault the opaque mass of humans who express a wide range of reactions to the thoughts of others because society is not a monoculture in spite of efforts toward the contrary.

If you are writing just to "build a brand" but the process isn't clicking internally maybe it's your spirit resisting the sociopathic impulses of your carnal desires. A lot of lifeless blogs I come across are such because I feel like I can sense that they are writing only to gain an audience who can raise their capital. So while the content may be informative it is lifeless and I feel little sympathy when a reader criticizes the author's work in a way that is indifferent to the spirit of the author and the author feels dismayed. It's not that your intended audience is revolting against you. You haven't even told them who you are. They are rejecting your business or your pining for employment that you have woven into your interpersonal communications.

And good for them!