[jauntywundrkind]

Yeah. I appreciate the warning & enjoy the personal tail, but it's just that guys story & it's being projected as an absolute.

If I don't enjoy the experience anymore that's fine with me too. I think I'd still feel a sense of accomplishment, feel like I'd advanced as a human and mastered my environment and machines for diving in here.

I don't feel the agency I want to have. These games make me want to extend myself, my agency. Playing them manually offers some very low grade enjoyment but that sense of missing out gnaws at me, and I'm not at all dissuaded by parent trying to ward me off, and if I do end up winning so hard I don't care anymore, me right now would regard that as a victory condition & rief from this pressure I feel about ineffectively plodding through as I do now.