[system7rocks]

Sometimes, this is the gift of having a trained chaplain, pastor, or advocate with you who has navigated these moments before. I’ve been in these moments with people in my church, and I don’t think it is always about the doctors or healthcare providers withholding info. Sometimes, you are the tenth person they have seen in a short period of time, so they are trying to communicate as best as they can, as efficiently as they can. Having someone - doesn’t have to be religious to be clear - who has been in those rooms can be helpful. They can repeat what the doctor says, because it can be so frightening and hard to hear.

I have asked doctors and anesthesiologists to come back into the room and finish answering the questions. I know they are busy. But I know they want to put you at ease and give you all the info you need.

- What side effects can we expect from the medication? - What alternatives are possible? What if the treatment doesn’t work? - What is the prognosis - worst case and best case? - How long will recovery be? - When can family members/loved ones see them? - Who will contact the family members during the procedure? - How soon will the patient be up and about? - Do you know the patients limits and directives - like no resuscitation?

More than once, I have helped the doctors hear something that they had missed, buried in all of those charts. More than once, I helped a friend or loved one gain some clarity on why the course of action is best or whether they want to explore something else.

Powerful story! And helpful language to think about them as a Bridge to Nowhere.

[tdrnl]

Some additional context and detail about hospital chaplaincy in the US:

1) In a major metro area, it's very likely that not all of the chaplains on staff at a hospital are Christian. It's rare, but increasingly likely, that chaplains are not even religious.

2) Chaplains have a primary responsibility to and the time and relationships with hospital staff to advocate for the patient and their family in addition to their more stereotypical duties providing emotional, religious, or spiritual support.

3) Chaplains also provide various types of support and guidance for your family or other loved ones -- so having a relationship with the hospital's chaplains can be a huge help for your loved ones if you are incapacitated for advocacy to the medical team, for navigating logistics, and for providing someone dispassionate to listen.

Of course, YMMV based on your location. In the deep south or outside a major metro, the chances that a given chaplain is an evangelical Christian who might try to convert you are higher.

And even in a major metro, you might find a chaplain who doesn't really want to do their job.

But if you're in the hospital and having trouble navigating the bureaucracy or getting the attention of your medical team, asking to visit with a chaplain can be very productive toward those ends.

[IG_Semmelweiss]

well put. In general , you want someone with experience who is also able to think clearly about the issue. But even having someone in there with you can make a huge difference.

I personally know of someone who almost died in a hospital from a medical error , and survived only because a family member decided to check on him at the hospital

[pfortuny]

My mom almost died from a hemorrage after my birth… Mu granma was there and noticed the sheets getiting red… This was of course many years ago, no monitors etc.