[andai]

I visited some relatives who are Jehovah's Witnesses. I was blown away by how rich their social life was. They hung out with people who lived nearby all the time.

I'm sure that kind of lifestyle also exists outside of a religious context, but it was quite striking. I've never seen anything like it. It made me wonder what life used to be like a hundred years ago, and what we've lost, or given up.

I guess church is the prime example of a Third Place, which appear to be in short supply.

[acdha]

In that case, however, you also see the drawbacks. The Witnesses discourage socialization outside of the church and also use shunning as a method of social control: if you disagree with the church on anything, your options are to acquiesce or lose your entire social network, even family members.

I share the desire for more social lifestyles - I think suburbanization is a huge driver of this - but want a secular form which doesn’t have the drawbacks many religions offer.

[andai]

Yeah, I've been wondering what the special sauce is. Is the religion part necessary to hold the whole thing together? e.g. you could replicate the other aspects, but would it last? It seems like people derive significant meaning from the religious aspect. Though this may also extend to ideology in general (e.g. political groups, or Effective Altruism meetups for example). The "shared mission" seems to be an important part of it.

[arp242]

I was a scout leader in my late teens and early 20s, and that had quite a lot of "sociality" to it, that went beyond "meet up for drinks occasionally".

[rexpop]

I don't go to church. My family has worked hard for generations to separate themselves from exploitative churches.

But now, at the end of this process, I am able to see better the cost of this separation. I don't regret it, and I am glad it was done, but it's clear that neither in nor out of a church is the 21st century adult made whole.

Somewhere there has to be a happy medium.