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by kragen
634 days ago
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this afternoon i couldn't have been doing woodworking because i don't have woodworking tools. that's not just because i can't afford them; my apartment is not really big enough for a woodworking shop, and i worry that the wiring might catch fire if i tried to plug in a high-powered saw. i'm having a hard time being content, despite going on a walk with my wife this morning and having lots of lovely conversations with strangers over the last three days, because the rent is due in two weeks and i'm nervous about whether i'll have enough. ever since i got covid for the third time in april, at which point i couldn't get paxlovid, i don't remember things like i used to. (i suspect that with enough money i could have gotten paxlovid.) also, my aunt is going to die soon, and i don't have the money to visit her before that i really wish i'd spent more effort on making, and saving, money 20 years ago. i wouldn't want to spend my life on it, and no amount of money will keep me from dying, but right now i'm spending a lot of my life coping with the consequences of not having it |
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