[n4r9]

Have to disagree with this. At a group meet-up where everyone arrives at different times and wants their order to come shortly after they do, a digital system is so much better. These type of meetups are quite common as a parent.

[GJim]

> where everyone arrives at different times and wants their order to come shortly after they do

Good god man!

At a social meal, we eat together; children included as this is how they learn to socialise. One would be a little concerned and puzzled if arriving for a meal, one finds others have already eaten.

[RamRodification]

If only we could have different social norms so you didn't have to argue about it online!

[n4r9]

As another commenter said, this is probably partly down to cultural expectations. The ideal would be to sit and eat together. In reality, one family might get held by up to an hour because their baby napped later than normal; another family is half an hour late because of traffic; another family had an nightmare nappy blowout situation and has to go back home for new clothes etc... . Being relaxed about arrival times is less stressful all round. The children will still socialise with each other in the overlapping times they are together.

[astura]

>children included as this is how they learn to socialise

Ummm... When was the last time you were out in public? I hate to break it to you but this doesn't happen, ever; if I see a kid in a restaurant they are pretty much always watching iPads. If they aren't watching an iPad they certainly aren't learning to socialize, because iPad-less kids in restaurants are almost always allowed to misbehave and be disruptive or even destructive.

[Fnoord]

Spoken clearly by someone who lacks experience with having children.

Look, it works pretty simple. Witching hour is right before dinner time. Kids are grumpy / hangry (hungry + angry). On top of that, young children have a short attention span and patience. Children certainly can socialize (after toddler age), but while sitting still at a restaurant table? Not for long. A tablet or smartphone is a tool to keep them distracted during waiting. Heck, playing is learning too, so it is IMO a learning tool.

That said, I can recommend a family restaurant.

For example, on vacation to Texel we went to this one [1]. I have not even seen the indoor playground (only outdoor) as the two times we were here the weather was great. Tons of children playing, the picture you see of the outdoor playground is not even 20% of the whole playground. It is quite large, with a special area for toddlers.

Moreover, we went to a family friendly bungalow park with activities for children, and the restaurant on the park (we didn't go to it this year but previous year) has an adjacent playground. If you're on a more tight budget, the same exists for camping.

Do children socialize on playgrounds? Toddlers kind of don't. They're still in their own world, at best they play 'parallel'. After toddler age? Absolutely. They form new bonds, become friends, they play together. They also get into conflict with each other, which forces them to learn conflict solving skills. They practice motor skills and build muscles. But I couldn't leave them completely alone, so I stayed in the vicinity. Hence, I did not socialize (which, as autistic as I am, I do not mind :P).

On top of that, I remember going to McDonald's as kid in the late 80s (it was one of the first McD's in my country) and they had a playground with balls in it. Also great fun. For the record: I did have a Nintendo game watch and Game Boy back then. But in the McD's such wasn't necessary.

And finally, to all those people who claim they want to socialize with strangers they visually meet. Yeah, that is why people sat on banks reading newspapers, why walkman and discman existed long ago already, why the hairdresser has magazines, why trains have a silent area where you can read a book, etc. Let's face it: not everyone is an extrovert.

[1] https://www.catharinahoeve-texel.nl/kids

[carlosjobim]

Here's a hint: Eating at a restaurant is not like eating in a school canteen. And it's not about stilling your hunger. You can eat in any order and pace that you prefer. So if people arrive at different times, you can share some starters while waiting for the other people to arrive. Then jump into some main courses when everybody is ready.

You're not supposed to arrive hungry to a restaurant, then you are doing it wrong. It's not about filling your belly.

[n4r9]

> you can share some starters while waiting for the other people to arrive. Then jump into some main courses when everybody is ready

True, and that does sometimes happen, depending on the situation. But still, this is much easier to do when you don't have to flag down the waiter everytime you want to order.

> You're not supposed to arrive hungry to a restaurant

Not if it's fine dining and I have low expectations about portion sizes. If I'm going to a "fast casual" restaurant like Nandos then I will arrive ready to eat. I dunno, maybe you're not classing that as a "restaurant" ?

P.S. "you are doing it wrong" is kinda moralistic! I respect that some people still prefer to speak to human beings when getting service, but cultural processes are always changing and adapting to new technology.

[carlosjobim]

Yes, I'm a bit moralistic about this, you're right. I think eating at a restaurant is a skill that a lot of modern people are not taught. It's not about eating, it is about socializing – unless you're going alone. Portion sizes have nothing to do with it, because you can order more food until you are satisfied.

Or, if money is tight and you really don't want to order more than your main meal, you can always have a bite at home before going out.

It's also possible to train your resistance to hunger, so that you can stand being hungry for 12 hours easy (let's hope service is not that slow). The way to train is to skip your meals during a day and wait until you become extremely hungry. Then just don't eat and after a couple of hours it passes. Do this three times on different occasions and after that you are trained for the rest of your life, and will never again become frustrated or desperate because of hunger.