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by rrggrr 5105 days ago
Hitting your kids is parenting for amateurs or dummies. Anytime I catch myself with the urge to hit I remind myself I'm a lot smarter than those little shits (whom I love immensely) and its just a matter of calmly reminding them of their incentives, both negative and positive. The same holds true for yelling. I find that having them look in my eyes and speaking very quietly and calmly accomplishes a lot more. YMMV.
4 comments
ekianjo 5105 days ago
Kids better take their hits from their own family first. They get used to the violence in society later this way, and get stronger through the process. I'd like to see you vindicate your view that adults raised without "physical" education end up being better adults. The trends in society certainly don't seem to indicate your are right.

As long as it's not abusive, disproportionate, and done in the proper circumstances and for the right reasons, there's nothing wrong with that.

Please note I'm not advocating beating up your child for no reason whatsoever. It should be the last resort to educate. But just like the experience of fire is necessary to fear it, the experience of authority through a variety of means has value.

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rrggrr 5105 days ago
@ekianjo http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_Ycw0d_Uow metaphorically the best response to your comment on multiple levels.

@larrys Make a list of your kid's 5 favorite things. Make hitting them the sixth option. Give them authority to choose between the bad behavior or losing the items sequentially. With most kids by the time you get to item three you have compliance. No hitting required. IMHO the key is letting them choose among consequences or to pursue the behavior. Gives them independence and boundries at the same time.

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larrys 5105 days ago
"Hitting your kids is parenting for amateurs or dummies."

That's very absolute a statement.

"matter of calmly reminding them of their incentives, both negative and positive."

As you said YMMV. Children are different from not only different families but within the same family. Punishment that works with one is pointless with another.

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kaybe 5105 days ago
As kids we learned from that that resorting to violence is an instant loss of the fight, since even the adult would admit it. Not the worst lesson to teach, I believe.
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