[viscanti]

This list is a joke, based on a similar list for imperative programmers writing a "hello world" program. There are certainly a number of ways to write write something in either paradigm.

The number of ways you can write something is a horrible metric to evaluate languages on. Any sufficiently clever programmer can come up with a number of bad solutions. The useful imperative techniques are more obvious to you because you have more experience with that framework. Experienced functional programmers would just as quickly narrow their list of useful solutions.

In order to be productive in a functional style, you don't need to know much of the language's standard library. You simply write small functions that can be applied in a number of areas. You'll probably end up re-inventing the wheel though, as most functional languages come with most of the essential functional constructs included in the standard library. If anything, functional programming is more beginner friendly, because you don't end up dealing with mutable state and you can easily work on the level of abstraction that you're most comfortable with (you're just composing ever more advanced functions from simpler ones).