[vasco]

My partner also has tattoos. I think people online pretend to be better than they are for some reason. I'm willing to bet every single offended person that is pointing the finger at the bad man that judges tattoos equally judges other meaningless things. At least I'm aware of it and try to keep it to myself and re-evaluate it every once in a while, instead of pretending I never have a bad thought.

[maronato]

You might want to revisit the meaning of keeping it to yourself.

The existence of hypocrisy doesn’t excuse you from fault for trying to offend every person with a tattoo.

[vasco]

Online discussion isn't the real world. I'm sharing thoughts in the spirit of positive discussion and didn't offend anyone.

Me thinking someone has low impulse control isn't an offense. Me telling them they have low impulse control is an offense (i never said this to anyone). Me being honest about the thought that came into my mind in a discussion board is also not an offense. And I cannot control the thoughts that come to my mind, only my actions after. If anything I learned to keep my mouth shut from this thread, it's the first and last time I discuss tattoos.

[fragmede]

I get what you're saying. sadly the Internet is no longer the place it once was. People are just looking for ways to get offended and go off and try and cancel people. thinking things isn't doing things. thinking evil thoughts but not acting on them is entirely fine and normal and human.

people have four levels of being, there's conscious you, lizard brain, addict brain, and ideal brain. lizard brain gets the most time. it's the baser sider of things that we can't help, like who we're attracted to (masc/femme/nb) or what we think of people with tattoos. Then there's conscious brain. that's the part of us that's rational and can recognize that lizard brain does and thinks dumb things. addict brain is where there's something you're addicted to. chemical/digital/physical; whatever. addict brain will rationalize that something that conscious brain knows is wrong into being okay. Oh it's just $10 dollars and it's only Candy crush. idea brain is who you are after an interaction has happened, when you win the argument in the shower or wake up knowing the solution to a problem. sometimes idea brain will happen in the moment, but most of the time it happens later.

anyway, we can't help lizard brain, especially when we're sleep deprived, high/drunk/groggy/strongly emotional, and it can say some horrible shit. some people are able to acknowledge that this happens to everyone and exists and is human and forgive other people when they do something, others pretend like that they're not like that and that it never happens to them.

This is the divide between introvert and extrovert, btw. introverts can't "mask off" around other people, so being around other people is exhausting for them. if they say they don't belive something but that this thought still happens, eg that people with tattoos are impulsive, they get excoriated for voicing having had the thought.

sadly, as you've found, the open Internet just isn't the place for that. thankfully, there are small private communities where people do understand such detail and nuance, but they're hard to find.

cards on the table though, my current tattoo wasn't the result of much planning, but having gotten one, I more respect the time and effort that goes into getting really good ones.

on my wish list is the https://imprintu.com/ temporary tattoo printer, which seems fun.

[hooverd]

> I find it a good litmus test for people. If you want to broadcast your low impulse control and bad decision making history, be my guest.

I can't find a way to read OP's comment that isn't derisive. I don't see we get "I just want a discussion" out of it.

[shocks]

> People are just looking for ways to get offended

Except I didn’t get offended.

Note that the parent hasn’t responded to the alternative perspective I offered; so I don’t really buy the “I’m here for discussion” spiel.

[shocks]

Nobody here claimed to be better than you; you just got called out for your judgemental comment.

I’ve offered a perspective that you may not have seen before.