[ciropantera]

As a new father that will eventually get into that situation: how do you ban Roblox in your house? I imagine it’s popular among your kids’ real world acquaintances (school etc). Doesn’t banning it exclude your kids from these groups? Do they feel left out?

Given the current state of gaming and where it’s heading I would love to ban gaming altogether but I feel social pressure from other kids makes it very hard.

[jajko]

I go against the stream it seems, but even though I grew up gaming, I see it now as mostly wasted time. Any benefit that came with it is easily overshadowed with literally wasting the most precious thing we have - our time in this universe which could be spent having serious adventures (or anything else like finding/working on love and real friends(TM)).

I've gotten into various sports mostly done in mountains and some additional filler training like weightlifting and running, my quality of life and satisfaction from it skyrocketed. Obviously you get much more healthier, attractive and happier as side effect, but over time your mindset also changes a lot.

These days, displays in our home are kept to the minimum since content is mostly toxic and made as addictive as possible (as mentioned all over this thread). As time progresses we will gradually ease it off, but games will be last thing on a long list. There is not much skill to learn so they are not missing out, clicking all around can be done by infants.

It helps that we are surrounded by people where such approach is the norm and mark of good invested parenthood, and letting kids get addicted to various dark patterns online or in gaming is seen as on cca same level as being absent alcoholic parent or similar fail. Not that I don't see it often ie when traveling, kids glued to screen to me looks very sad while their parents often look like epitome of laziness. Physically and mentally weak, socially awkward, stuck in eternal dopamine kick chase, largely defenseless from sophisticated actors milking their parents credit cards.

[johnnyanmac]

Everyone will have different experiences. I turned that gaming passion into a career and am fortunately much better off than my single mother who struggled raising me.

(and speaking of parents: who the hell is letting a kid use their credit card? I bought an extra $.75 butterfingers one time and it was probably the most mad my mom ever got at me. More than when I dinged the car while learning to drive. I NEVER spent her money again without asking).

Games help motivate me to read (being into RPGs with little/no voice acting will do that), they arguably enhaced my logic puzzle ability and reaction time, they gave me something to bind over with like minded acquaintances.

I think it really comes down to a case by case basis.

[Shocka1]

I'm mostly in agreement with ya. I've always been big into the outdoors as it's what truly allows me to recharge. Fishing/hiking/hunting/mountainbiking, etc. All of it is good for the soul. As the kids have gotten older I've been able to get them out in the same activities. In my house 8/10 times we are outside doing outdoorsy stuff, while the other 20% is gaming.

The type/quality of the games definitely matters IMO. My six year old really enjoys DCS World and Kerbel Space program. Roblox is a total no go in my house, but I rarely deny my kid from wanting to land a jet or build a rocket.

[spreiti]

Explain them the concepts of loot boxes and pay to win. My son, who was 8 at that time, understood quiet fast that these games don't require skill and are just trying to steal money from him. He doesn't like that and now avoids games that contain these dark patterns and has become quiet good at spotting them.

Also, buy a Nintendo console. It solves 99% of all problems. I haven't seen these dark patterns in any Nintendo title and personally I think it's the best gaming environment for kids.

[lolinder]

> Doesn’t banning it exclude your kids from these groups? Do they feel left out?

The way I was raised we understood that most kids do things that come back to bite them later and we could choose to be better than that.

I don't feel guilty for teaching my kids to avoid drugs and alcohol—the friend groups that would actually fully exclude them from aren't worth their time anyway. I feel the same about Roblox. It's a dangerous drug produced by an intentionally exploitative company.

If refusing to participate causes a particular friend group to become inaccessible, that says something about the amount of time that friend group spends on the drug and therefore says something about the utility of the time my kid would have spent with them anyway.

[watwut]

My kids did not paid a cent nor did most of their friends. There are some paid a little, no more then the relatively normal amount of money. If someone 8 years old is paying a lot of money for Roblox while his friends prefer roblox because it is free, then the issue is provably solvable.

Beyond limiting infinite amount of paying by not giving the kid infinite amount of money, you can limit their time in the app or on tablet by rules like "max X hours per week".