[wallflower]

I've observed my naturally social friends (some of whom can go up to a group solo and initiate conversations) and I have come to the conclusion that it is a combination of (1) pattern recognition and (2) confidence. (1) - They have done it so many times they don't consciously grok about what they are doing, letting them be more truly aware/in the moment. (2) - In Daniel Goelman's "Emotional Intelligence" he cites studies where if you are nervous you can make someone else feel your nervousness/unease and make them feel uneasy (because their brain is empathizing at a sub-conscious level). Bonus observation - the universe rewards boldness.

As always, easier to read than to do.

I'd like to share a bonus tip from a master conversationalist/networker I met:

If you find yourself stuck with another solo person in a lagging interaction/conversation - do not shake hands and say "it was nice to talk to you. See ya" Instead state your intention and let them make a choice: "I'd like to talk to that group starboard. Come with me" This is powerful because you are taking the lead - and people always will appreciate leadership. If they do not want to continue hanging out with you, you've given them a graceful exit stage-right.

[kirubakaran]

I'll add a link to tips that you gave earlier on the same topic: http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=119006

It was very useful.