[fragmede]

You don't like being drunk that much, or like climbing, but, were your parents really that Catholic? We, as humans, need a dream to build towards, be in service of, and find our place in. What are we doing here and why are we doing it? For those of us who haven't figured it out yet, attaching to someone else's purpose gives us one and we don't have to figure it out ourselves.

You need to find religion, just don't call it that. Find your dream that's impossible and work towards making it possible. figure out your role in making that possible. and then work on it. as hard as you can. find others along the way.

[rjzzleep]

Parent poster doesn’t want to have to drink to socialize. And bar meets are just that. It’s actually a huge problem in society.

Ever stream something or go to the cinema ? What does it show you? You’re happy => you drink to celebrate. You’re sad => drink out of sorrow. You want to hang out with friends => you go for drinks. DEFCON for example perpetuates that same behavior.

Sure, one part is loss of community, but the other half is toxic social behavior that is perpetuated by Hollywood. The people that don’t like this but want to belong will perpetuate this cycle for fear of getting ostracized.

[nradov]

In most communities there's no longer much social stigma against going to a bar/pub and ordering non-alcoholic beverages. The latest non-alcoholic beers are actually pretty good. (I do understand that the environment itself can be difficult for recovering alcoholics.)

[HideousKojima]

I used to go out not-drinking with my coworkers (I've been a teetotaler my entire life). The place we went to had free refills for sodas so I downed half a dozen glasses of Fanta while my coworkers were paying $3-$5 a beer. Seems ridiculous to me how much people pay for alcohol.

[throwup238]

A bunch of places now have "mocktails" which are just cocktails without alcohol so you can one up your alcoholic friends by spending $3-5 per glass of sugar water.

[floren]

Visit SF, you can easily spend $10 on a mocktail out here.

Kinda makes sense, all the cost is in the labor and the cleaning, a shot of vodka is like $0.20

[oerpli]

The spirit in a decent cocktail is closer to ~$3-5.

[Scharkenberg]

I would assume there is no vodka in a mocktail...

[lotsofpulp]

Some portion of alcohol prices are a barrier to entry to create the desired crowd. You might not want to attract the type of person looking to get shitfaced for cheap. Usually, non alcoholic non tap water is not way cheaper, especially if it is a “mocktail”.

Of course, some portion is also high rents. And I have never seen a restaurant or bar outside of Costco with free refills for anything other than tap water though.

[vel0city]

Lots of places around me have free refills on fountain soft drinks and tea. In fact, it is pretty rare for a restaurant to not have free refills on things like sodas. Something fancier like a craft lemonade or whatever wouldn't have free refills though.

This is true for a lot of the places I travel to within the US as well.

[lotsofpulp]

Interesting. I’m most familiar with west coast and northeast, and can’t say I have ever seen that.

[watwut]

But if you have to pay an expensive entry into that space, you will naturally limit who will go there and how often. And I do not just means "excludes people who get shitfaced". I mean "excludes people who are conscious about spending money or simply do not have super high salaries".

[lotsofpulp]

Yes, that is also sometimes an intended barrier to entry.

[fragmede]

while there are clearly cash grabs by the industry, the money for drinks goes towards the bar's rent/staff, so going there and not spending any money doesn't help the establishment's continued existence. depending on the establishment, that may or may not be a concern.

[Apocryphon]

Well, you can also go to the café.

[mensetmanusman]

The world religion comes from Latin meaning ‘to bond with ritual’

It’s not very smart to not have a ritual of community building in one’s life.