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Like others, I empathize with this, but it got me wondering more what that difference is, because I have "achieved" a lot more in helping a group than I have as an individual. Over time I have learned for myself, at least part of the reason, is that you don't get those moment when the thing works. Those immediate and really apparent moments, where you did the hard thing, and even if there is more to do, you solved the problem. You don't get those moments as a manager, because people aren't machines and you can't assume anything. A hard won consensus building moment can be flip-flopped on, a coached employee who you thought really felt empowered can still struggle to speak up, etc. In other words, I think success just tickles things different neurologically between IC and management, and I think recognizing that is probably critical to know. If you are deciding to manage, you have to be ready 'give up' the high of solving directly or risk turning into a micro-manager or not giving enough autonomy. As a manager learning to be okay with struggling with why motivation or burnout is more of a struggle, and you just don't get those same rejuvenating moments. At least that is how I have come to feel about it, but I am still learning to find what other moments I can recognize as a manager to allow my brain to get the rewards for the hard effort. |