[Msurrow]

> I'm getting cold feet because of the money

Try this thought experiment:

Think of the best memories you have in the last 1-2 years.

Think of the best memories you had between 5-10 years ago.

I’m willing to bet that the “core” of all the memories/episodes you thought of was people and experiences. Family and great friends. Travel, parties, hobbies, whatever is your thing.

You did not think of money or things you bought. You did not think of a nice pay check.

Now, I’m not going full hippie here. Money is important, but only up to a point. If you have just enough money to do the things you like with friends and family, that’s all you need.

The job you really liked vs the high paying one is fun experiences vs pay checks/things. Pick the good experience b/c in 1 year, 2 years, 5 years you won’t remember the money.

Caveats: If you are very young 20-something and no kids or serious relationship, you should consider gunning hard for the money for a few years to build some investments that will help you, enable you, to take the pay cut when you get older and esp. when you have kids. If it turns out that you like the little suckers, future you may be eternally greatful to now you for laying down the foundation for future you to not worry that much about money and instead focus on kids, family, experiences.

[bad_username]

> Travel, parties, hobbies

These things generally require a "nice pay check" though.

[Msurrow]

It can, but it certainly doesnt need to.

For travel there are probably many destinations in your own country, that people actually visit your country to see. Those a typically cheaper to do. Then there is asia - I’ve traveled tree months in asia for the same budget as 10 days visiting the States. Also in general very much depends on how/where you say. Hotel in Auckland vs pet sitting gig for a week 15 mins outside of the city (housing for free).

Same for hobbies. Depends so much on what you pick for a hobby.

[senordevnyc]

Once you have kids, this calculus becomes way more complicated.

[Msurrow]

Oh yes. I have two. What I dont get is how having 2 more persons somehow makes everything travel related at least 4x more expensive?! Anyway, there is no “roughing it through asia” with two little ones. Thats why I wrote the caveat with grinding cash while early 20s, to build a little extra to draw on when the this happens

[senordevnyc]

Yeah, it's some about cost, but it's also about logistics, education, wanting kids to have stability, relationships with extended family, special needs, physical safety, etc, etc. In my case also add custody to the mix, which makes extended travel a non-starter.