| “Get out there” means “just pick something—anything!!—and show up.” Go to a local gathering place (cafe, bar, church, literally wherever people hang out), look at the pinboard to find an upcoming thing to go to. Ask people what they do for fun. Whatever you do, don’t look for the “perfect” thing. It doesn’t exist, and waiting for/seeking it gets in the way of you actually meeting people. Be curious. Isn’t that a fundamental trait of the intellectual? Consider everything, turn over every stone? The world is crawling with interesting people who would be your friends. Socialization is a give-and-take; expect to give (maybe listen to some “crap music” with others) before you can take. One more thing: it sounds like you’ve built a superiority complex. Kill that. It’s a facade you’ve built to insulate yourself. You’ll never meet others with it … or you’ll just meet other snobs. Consider that there may be someone out at those “inane” events who feels the same as you, but is out there looking for you to show up! Addendum: this has momentum. Once you start meeting people and feeling more confident, it won’t feel like work anymore. At that point, you may actually find yourself engaging people like your former self. |