[smeej]

Does maximizing options maximize empowerment? I've found I feel much more empowered in a situation where I've already deeply committed to some specific thing than when I have dozens of options but haven't chosen one. Intentionally closing the door on thousands of options is actually the only path I've found that's made it possible for me to grow at all. If I maximize options, I can just escape when faced with a growth opportunity, not actually have to grow through it.

I remember sitting up late one night in my twenties overwhelmed by the sheer number of doors I would never open. Not metaphorical doors--actual, physical doors to physical buildings and rooms. It had hit me earlier that day that the number of doors I would even encounter in my life is infinitesimal compared to the total number of doors, and the ones I would open of that tiny subset were orders of magnitude smaller still.

I suppose I could have responded to this by making some strange life rule where I always try the handle on every door, but I think I grew a lot more by deciding it doesn't matter, that opening all the doors, or even maximizing my chances to open doors, would be a waste of my life. So I guess they doubled as metaphorical doors after all.

I don't know how measurable it would be, but I would rather measure my personal growth by the peace I've managed to find with the realities I can't change and the choices I've made. For instance, I'm not infinite. I'm going to die. There will be things I dislike about the world that won't change during my lifetime. Stuff like that. That seems like a better measure to me of how much I'm growing.

[jskherman]

I think it's not so much as having many options but more so of having a lot of backup plans for when things eventually go wrong. There's analysis paralysis after all. It would be better to say that empowerment is maximized when there is a definitively best choice and there are several good backup choices (complete with sensible rankings down the chain of backups, ideally definitive) if the original choice suddenly becomes unavailable due to the arbitrariness of life.

[smeej]

Hmm. I actually still find I'm subjectively freer when I can peacefully face the reality in front of me, even when it's not something I would want.

My mom is a good example to me. The first time she got diagnosed with cancer (12 years ago), she had option option option. There was everything to try, but it was all fraught with the pressure of making the wrong choice, or messing something up, or not knowing.

This time, after she'd been cancer-free for 12 years and got diagnosed with a whole different cancer, it's been so different. She'll either beat it or she won't. Anything that's tried will either work or it won't. It will suck either a little or a lot, until it doesn't anymore, for one reason or another. She's subjectively freer now because she's not trying to get out of the "bad" options. They're just coming and she's just going through them.

She seems a lot more empowered this go-round.

You know that part of the Serenity Prayer, about "the wisdom to know the difference"? I feel more empowered when I don't try to judge that with a razor's margin. When I stop thinking, "Maybe, if I just try hard enough or in exactly the right way, this could be 'something I can change,'" and recognize how small my impact actually is on anything but my own life and the lives of the people very closest to me, the more empowered I feel.

[mattgreenrocks]

Knowing when to optimize for optionality and when to burn the boats is key. Some things in life improve markedly when you let go of optionality and instead lean in to the constraint: significant relationships, jobs, parenting. Everyone's disposition biases them toward one side or the other.

Recognizing when each approach is useful, and being able to do it (even poorly) is a great skill.

[charlie0]

Letting go of optionality is a good thing when you have a safety net to fall back on. If you don't have one, the next best thing is to have various escape hatches available.

[chiphuyen]

I've also found that sometimes, to maximize options, I have to first commit to an option. I've had situations before where I deliberated too long and missed the opportunity altogether.

[charlie0]

You hit the nail on the head. Increasing optionality is a very powerful tool that not enough people utilize.

[sungho_]

You are confusing words. In the context of the OP, "having many options" doesn't mean indiscriminately hoarding everything. It's like making choices in chess that result in having more options for moving pieces. The "premature optimization is the root of all evil" saying is an even more lacking analogy, but it conveys a similar idea. In other words, the advice to increase your options applies even if you dedicate your entire life to just one thing.

[halfcat]

Reminds me of the quote:

The enemy of art is the absence of limitations

I’ve found many times in life that limitations and obsessing over quality lead to more growth than obsessing over productivity.

I remember asking a guy who worked at a high end place how he liked working there. He said, “It’s good…if you’re good”

It can’t be all option-maximizing and no mastery.