[happytoexplain]

I know this is a form a victim-blaming, but the other party isn't here, so I can only address you: You can not treat this behavior in the way you've described. Every time somebody accepts victimhood even in small ways, it hurts everybody.

Basic, "default" levels of respect for people is the most foundational layer of humanity. For the sake of society, do not accept petty acts of disrespect.