My life is special to me too, but I don't feel like the main character anymore. My family appreciates my move out of self-absorption towards giving them the attention they deserve from me.
I really don't know what to think. Sure, there's 8 billion people on Earth, the chances that I am the main character are tiny. But at the same time whenever I try treating people the same way I treat myself, I quickly get into misunderstandings and disappointments, and navigating the world with an assumption that most people are NPCs while just a handful are actual sentient beings has proven way more practical.
There's no way to get around the feeling that many people are NPCs if you spend time in sterile urban or suburban environments. The amount of people whose existence consist of very little more than work to fuel consumption is really high.
On the contrary if you are in a place where no one really works a normal job and things you bought or paid money to do are rarely topics of conversation then the interactions feel much more living.
What if you try to treat people the way they want to be treated instead of how you want to be treated?
I think the "golden rule" has been often misinterpreted as " treat people how you want to be treated" which leads to this misunderstanding that you called out. If we change it to being empathetic towards them and treating them how they want to be treated, the NPCs seem to become fully fledged characters.
I know what you mean. Since I've been using ChatGPT4 and now Claude Opus to answer questions I think of while day dreaming, I find myself drifting further away from ordinary people. I don't know how to describe it yet. Maybe people who don't agument their thinking seem more like an NPC and say NPC like things?
I don't want to get to far out there, like in Kurt Vonnegut's "Breakfast of Champions." The protagonist wanted to kill himself because he thought everyone except him was a robot.
Let's please reframe how bad it is to treat another person as an NPC. It is dehumanizing. It encourages losing focus on why people behave the way they do, rather than learning to hold empathy for the reality of life for the millions of people that surround us. Life isn't easy for many. Many don't have the opportunities to learn or are at least encouraged to do that.