[atleastoptimal]

The more cringe you can bear the faster you can improve.

Record yourself saying stuff and play it back to yourself, and then imagine saying it in a normal conversation. Does it mesh with the context, does it seem fitting. Is your vocal tone or cadence upsetting or reassuring? Compare it with the way known charismatic/comforting people speak.

Generally emotional intelligence is putting yourself in other people's heads and understanding the way they'll react to circumstances and the things you say and do. It's also understanding that people vary, and mental states vary, so the way you approach any interaction has to factor these things in.