[achempion]

Look up "Peterson emotional intelligence" on YouTube to explore a slightly different take on emotional intelligence.

Jordan Peterson argues that EQ doesn't exist, and you can explore your personality with the Big 5 (mostly agreeableness).

I suggest also looking into "Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg" as it closely matches the issue you described.

[nemothekid]

EQ isn't rigidly defined, Peterson has been right on that metric, but I think to say it doesn't exist (or to equate it agreeableness) isn't right either. IMO, someone with poor EQ probably also demonstrates poor theory of mind (and I personally put Peterson in this camp).

High EQ, as a skill, is mostly charisma, and can be learned. Dale Carnegie is a good first step, but it also has to be practiced with other people (which is also why I find it hard to develop - you can practice math equations in solitude, but you it's very hard to practice charisma).

[01HNNWZ0MV43FF]

I wouldn't take advice from Peterson on agreeableness or emotional intelligence, he seems pretty unfriendly.

[azmodeus]

I watched his video and personally feel emotional intelligence is often used as a proxy of communication skills in general with agreeable motifs when needed

I feel there’s a strong skill aspect to it as the very emotionally intelligent people I came across had a lot of communication experience