[vita7777777]

This sounds a lot like my own story. Your last sentence in particular sends chills down my spine, because that was exactly where I was stuck for perhaps 15 years. (I was diagnosed at 14 and CGMs would not be available for more than a decade still.)

Please don't give up! It's absolutely possible to break through this mental block and improve your results and mindset step by step. It is a tough journey, but it can be empowering.

I don't know where you're at now, but for me the change started with honestly tracking my data and looking the truth in the eye. I learnt to review the data regularly and think about my results, and the possible interventions I could do. And, well... it's been like that ever since :) Endless incremental improvements and occasional setbacks, but with a clear trend towards higher TIR and lower BG variance.

On the practical side of things, if you're tech-savvy I can recommend the Diabetech podcast: https://www.diabetechpodcast.com/