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by helboi4 848 days ago
How do you overcome this? I've avoided things due to emotional discomfort my whole life and I don't think I can ever do better at this point. I find that it requires conscious effort to learn to do things that are required as standard for most adults.
2 comments

With math specifically I had a good teacher in high school who made us practice in class together. He'd get everyone to sit around a table and he'd give handheld whiteboards to every fourth or fifth person (depending on the number of basic steps in the problem), and then the person with the whiteboard would do the first step and pass it to the person on their right. That experience stuck with me because just forcing me to get started (with help available) was enough to quickly clear up anything I was avoiding getting started on at home.

I still avoid doing things because they're emotionally uncomfortable occasionally, so I haven't really found a general solution. But it's gotten better over time and it's less of an issue when I'm more invested in something.

I have found the advice in this Andrew Huberman video to be helpful. Long version: [1] Useful clip from that longer video: [2]

TL;DR: motivation is a muscle that can be developed as long as your efforts to do so are voluntary. In other words, do the hardest thing that you can actually do, even if it is just pick up one piece of trash and put it in the garbage. Or wash one dish. The list of possibilities is endless. The idea is to face your discomfort, and as you do so repeatedly, your ability to do so increases.

[1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8OHYynw7Yh4 [2] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BoutTY8XHSc

+1 for Andrew Huberman

Controlling Your Dopamine For Motivation, Focus & Satisfaction:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmOF0crdyRU

ADHD & How Anyone Can Improve Their Focus:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hFL6qRIJZ_Y