[smeej]

Hmm. When it comes to "a terrible waste," I seem to have ended up at exactly the opposite conclusion for myself, that I would feel like it had been so much more of a waste to die having only done the work and built the relationships that accompany short stays in a variety of places, and never having done the deep work of belonging anywhere.

[underlogic]

But what does belonging translate to in material terms? I genuinely don't understand this it's foreign to me. It seems like one of those fantasy concepts indoctrinated to encourage people "to take one for the team" and accept a lesser deal and status in the tribe. Some locations have less to offer than others and those that choose to stay get a lower quality of life, often for more effort. In a way they're exploited, that's how I see it. Those communities manipulate their populations into staying put at the expense of the individuals, because they need them

[smeej]

Does the only value of something come from what it "translates to in material terms"? What material terms are you trying to measure?

Knowing that when something goes awry in your life, or you want some advice from someone who's done something you hope to do, or believing that you can get enough people together to solve a problem--I don't know how you measure those in "material terms," but knowing you aren't going through life alone, but with people who have your back, and whose backs you have--that's worth vastly more to me than any material thing I can think of.