[khzw8yyy]

Then there are some of us for whom this smooth communication is a huge challenge. We spend a lot of time and energy masking, trying to fake the perfect vibe (and failing of course, because the result is predictably unnatural), but this is a necessary survival tactic.

This is why all the talk of valuing neurodiversity is BS. The leaders want an autistic savant without the autistic part. Playing one is exhausting and can never be done perfectly.

The problem as I see it is that people tend to see communication issues as a character flaw. They don't think it's a handicap like poor vision or a broken leg, but must stem from laziness or worse.

[ok_dad]

Thanks for writing it in a clearer way than I could write it.

I sometimes long for a set of different drugs that people could take that would impair their brain/body for a short time in a similar way to how people experience the world as someone with autism or adhd or whatever else. I am sure that would be a somewhat "bad" idea, but I think it could also be a help in some cases. I'm autistic myself and it took me years of learning about autism and watching my autistic child before I really grokked how much of an impairment it has been for me in my life. That I am an old man with a relatively decent life and financial position for an American is a miracle, honestly, based on what I know now. I definitely had my Swiss cheese holes line up (in a good way this time) for me to be able to sail through the cheese of life this easily so far! I am not sure I can maintain that luck now, though.

[ska]

I get that, really I do.

Depending on the team and project , those challenges balanced against the pluses may mean that it’s worth doing anyway , or equally they may mean that it is not. It can be exhausting for the other people involved also.

I agree that anyone treating it as a character flaw is problematic and unlikely to result in effective mitigations. There also aren’t always effective mitigations , this stuff is all pretty context dependent .