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by kaycebasques
867 days ago
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At a techno club! I went by myself and was just dancing a little in the back. She approached me and said hello. We danced for a little bit but I was tired and was about to go home so I asked if I could take her on a date. The power of "putting yourself out there" I suppose. I was also peacocking pretty strongly in those days. Signaling that you care about your personal presentation is definitely a "can't hurt, might help" tactic! I think those are all the relevant facts about how we met but I'll also mention that "meeting your SO" is very much like "getting your foot in the door" for a job interview. "Keeping your SO" is a whole different game akin to "getting the job offer" or "performing well at that job long-term" or better yet, "embarking on a deep spiritual journey". I recommend reading The Soul Of Sex by Thomas Moore for getting in the right headspace of "keeping an SO". I recall The Art Of Loving by Erich Fromm also being helpful. Like any other major endeavor in life, my bet is that I have to commit to a lifelong learning process; in my case I'm always trying to improve my communication, keep the relationship fun, fiercely protect the trust we've built up, keep the passion going, etc. Good luck! We've only been married for two years (together 4 total) so definitely don't put too much weight on my perspective - just a fellow traveler like yourself sharing what's worked for me so far |
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