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I'm 38 and I understand this feeling. I'm a software engineer with a wife and kid (age 6) and a lot of my time is spent with them (and happily, too). I'm with you, I also don't watch much TV (I usually just watch some youtube clips) and I haven't touched a video game in a long while. I don't really like sports either (I like playing them, though) so when I get into talks with other guys, once they got onto sports I can't really contribute (but it doesn't bother me). Like another person mentioned, I would also recommend reading How to Win Friends and Influence people. It's a great resource to learn how to engage in conversation with people even when you think you have nothing to discuss. For the other person, if you can get them to talk about themselves, it won't really matter if you're "boring" because they'll think you're charming and want to engage with you. Another great resource is The Power of Charm by Brian Tracy (particularly helpful if you find yourself socially awkward). Since I don't have too much time outside of work/family, one thing I've done is learned how to be a better cook. And over the years, I've learned different dishes, how to cook steaks _really_ well, breakfasts (I make a killer French toast), etc. Eventually I started inviting other families over for dinner and I would cook for them - so this became my hobby that people knew about (and who doesn't like a tasty free meal?). I got so into it and good at it that recently, I had some friends of mine ask me to cook them a Thanksgiving turkey for their New Year's party, which I was honored to do. There were guests at the party that I didn't know, and when they tried the turkey, they liked it and then started asking me about how I did it, what were the ingredients, etc. (I became "interesting," so to say). My bigger point is that if you find something that you can do that others will appreciate (i.e. cooking, tutoring junior devs, getting really good a finances and helping others with theirs, etc.), you will naturally fall into a hobby that others will enjoy and appreciate you for (and therefore, will find you interesting). > How do I find the time? Start small, test iteratively, fail early, refactor. Much like coding :) |