[tanseydavid]

>> When I meet new people, I realize I don't have much to say because nobody cares about my work or my family or my books (nor should they, necessarily).

I recommend reading "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie.

The book won't remedy all of the problems you list, but it should help you to recognize the power which comes from getting people to talk about themselves -- which they love to do.

When you use these techniques you will be very surprised at how little speaking you actually need to do.

[solardev]

This book changed my life for the better, and allowed me to form lasting relationships I otherwise wouldn't have had.

It's not mutually exclusive with developing personal hobbies and passions though. It's really cool when you meet someone who shares them because they also put in the time and effort to develop it on their own.

Both types of interactions are wonderful and they complement each other well, IMO. If you can get to know them deeper, it makes every interaction more worthwhile and engaging. If you also happen to share interests, it's easier to have fun together. Win-win!

[bilsbie]

I overdid it with that book and I ask too many questions and listen too much. People come away from conversations not knowing a single thing about me.

[solardev]

Yeah, it's possible to be too "robotic" with that strategy. I think one of the main themes of the book is sincerity, though, like finding something truly interesting about the other person that you can relate with, respect, or like. From there it opens up avenues for sharing about yourself too, and hopefully the reciprocity breeds more openness and closeness?

Also, some people are just talkers who will go on and on about their lives and never ask or care about yours, lol. They're best in small doses :)