[itsboring]

Two kids having some kind of competitive tantrum is so much more difficult than just one kid having a tantrum. They set each other off over and over in some kind of fucking feedback loop from hell. Sometimes the only strategy that works is to get them separated ASAP any way you can, which can be really hard if there’s only one grown-up home at the time and the kids’ bedrooms share a wall….

[ninkendo]

Two kids is just so much harder than one, it’s ridiculous. Like easily 10 times harder than just one kid. I have two boys aged 2.5 and 8mo, and I’m starting to wonder how any parent of two stays sane. Three or more must just be impossible. Can’t be done. My mother (3 of us under 4 years old) must have been some kind of super hero.

Anyone who has been through this, does it ever get easier?

[earthboundkid]

Those are the tough years, yes. Hold on. When they're 3 and 5, it will be easier to get them to go in the same direction. Especially when everyone is potty trained.

[itsboring]

I know what you mean. I’ve got two girls, 5 and 6, who love to fight over the pettiest shit. Like, when they’re in the car, one will yell “she’s looking out MY window!” “NO I’M NOT” “YES YOU ARE” etc.

The good news is that at their age right now I’ve been noticing more and more moments where they’re nice to each other, help each other out, etc. Still plenty of rivalry, but it seems to be on the decline in the past six months or so.

[iambateman]

Totally agree. My wife and I have a 4 and 10mo and it’s brutal for us right now.

Juggling those two ages is tough for us because there is no overlap…they don’t play, eat, or sleep in the same ways so it feels like there’s a negative economy of scale.

[chasd00]

You’re at peak insanity so just hang in there. It for sure gets easier but the issues change, you begin to have to convince and change minds vs just keeping them from nose diving off the back of the couch.

I have 13 and 11 year old boys which is pretty sweet at the moment. We talk about games, space, music, and other stuff. They’re old enough to have opinions and something to say but still young enough to see me as the most powerful being in their universe haha

[munksbeer]

I feel the same. Kids of 4.5 and 2. I can't say it gets easier yet. Two childrens are so much harder than one. And people told me the opposite, that the biggest change was having one kid and the next wasn't such a big step. That turned out to be completely false.

When we (the parents) take one child each for a day, it feels so much easier than even having both of us together dealing with two.

[bruce511]

It gets easier. Because you get better at it. It doesn't feel like it now, but you're OK. Every month, every year, just gets a bit easier, and frankly, more fun.

To your point about 3 or 4 - again it gets easier because you get better. Going-out-bags get smaller. You discover kids are resilient. You learn to let go of some expectations.

[GiorgioG]

It doesn't get easier. It just gets different. And then you become your parents' parents as they get old.

Just get through it one day at a time.

[knicholes]

I'm the youngest of seven kids. The older kids raise the younger kids.

[koolba]

People with small families simply don’t understand the economies of scale and free labor pool that comes with raising a soccer team.