[saiya-jin]

Don't do them unless with very good person managing the whole set of the trip, better sober. The risks are not worth potential gains. Its kind of self-feeding - once you got paranoid/uncomfortable, it gets much easier to get into that place on further trips, since its usually just one mental muscle 'move'.

In contrary if you would manage to find a reliable good setter, you could move from that anxiety. But I don't know your details so take this with a massive pinch of salt, very unhappy childhood can mean many things including those that probably don't work well with psychedelics, ever.