[LukasRos]

Author here. Yes, I've used introversion and extroversion mostly to mean the amount of socializing one does, and that's probably not the best definition of those terms because they also relate to energy. And people are not a perfect binary. I've heard terms like ambivert and "low energy extrovert" which I think describe me well.

One thing you said well is how you put in the effort even though it was an energy drain. Because you felt the reward - finding a partner - was worth it. And I have mostly not felt that way.

[warner25]

That makes sense. And I'll add that feeling the reward was energizing. For whatever reason, I experienced interest from a few girls in high school even before I made much of an effort, and I had just enough success in my first two years of college to keep me going even when it wasn't going well.

I'd compare it to the sport of golf, in which it's well known that hitting just one good shot (straight and pure) in a hundred will keep a beginner playing for the next thousand shots because they feel sure that they can do it again.