[godshatter]

When I try to see an apple, I see absolutely nothing. I can pretend that there is an apple in front of me and that it's spinning or whatever, but all I've really done is remember what attributes I've given it and roughly what size it is.

There are some odd things I've paid attention to since I became aware I had aphantasia and that it was a thing. I know for a fact that my dreams are visual because I've had lucid dreams before and was aware of them being visual and at a higher fidelity than my eyes can normally see. I do see images when I'm almost asleep or not quite awake yet. I've seen some images after meditating for a long while, but I suspect I was just starting to fall asleep. Other than that, eerily enough, the only thing I've been able to see that doesn't involve photons hitting my retinas when completely awake is the ghost of a young woman that shyly watches me from the hallway when I'm sometimes watching TV that I've seen on a few occasions. Make of that what you will because I have no idea what to make of it.

[japostoles]

Minus the last couple sentences, I would describe things the same way you did in terms of visualizing, and have experienced all those things.

Along the same lines as the young woman you're experiencing, I used to get out of body experiences/sleep paralysis/waking dreams (pick a label) nightly when I was in my 20s, and I would see shadows and outlines of what would seem like energies. That was mostly non-visual and interpretive, which feels more like my minds-eye than a dream.

Not to go off topic, but ever try communicating with the shy woman?

[godshatter]

No, I never tried and she hasn't come around for a few months that I've noticed. I don't know if she's a ghost or whatever, but if it is something that's self-aware I didn't want to give it the impression that I was inviting it into my home.

The first time I saw her I did go search around the house in case I had a "homeless person living in a cupboard" scenario.

I've never experienced sleep paralysis, thankfully, even when working on being able to dream lucidly.

On the topic of aphantasia, I would expect sleep paralysis and any visual hallucinations to be on the dreaming/near to dreaming side of the fence since that circuitry seems to work for people with aphantasia as far as I can determine. If I try to think of specific memories involving people I am very close to I can get a flash of something that goes away before I'm even really aware of it that seems to be in the side channel people talk of. It doesn't seem to work for anything not emotionally connected, and only rarely.

The lady that has visited me was felt completely different. Thinking back, I have also been able to see auras, and just proved to myself that I still have that ability. It might be a visual abnormality or something, though. If I was actually visualizing, it was an overlay and not on a side channel.

[bafe]

I stil (occasionally) get sleep paralysis in the form of a person descending a rope from the ceiling or trying to enter from the window. Over time I learned to recognise it for what it is and control my reaction, saving a few bedside lamps in the process