[chiefalchemist]

Trust real Trust, by definition, is *not* the default position. If it's not earned, it's not trust. Anything else? Call it what you want, but it's not trust.

Politicians and other opportunists love to leverage the false idea that trust is a default. The bar is higher.

[snickell]

I don't see why this is "by definition". I understand that "default to trust must be earned" is a common position in modernity, but that makes me sad. Even if this were a good life principle at the moment, I think that's more a reflection on the current state of the world rather than an invariable fact of life.

As to my own behavior, I concur with ThisMustBeTrue, at least when it comes to people: I default to trusting, but quickly withdraw that trust if it is violated. Its much harder to earn back the trust you had for free at the beginning.

Looking to the dictionary, since definition was mentioned, I find: trust(noun) firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something. When we first meet, I default to assuming you are reliable, honest and capable. Most people I've encountered in life are these things. Should I assume you are flakey? A liar? Incompetent? I think it robs strangers of their humanity to assume this of them by default.

I find my stance on default to trust depends on the category of entity being trusted. I don't default to trusting organizations (in contrast to individuals, I have sadly experienced orgs as being unreliable, dishonest, and incompetent) for the most part, but I do default to trusting people. Individual people, as a class, have earned my trust, whereas groups of people driven by financial incentives, as a class, have lost my trust enough times I default to skepticism.

I think its a good goal to strive to build a world where "default to trust" makes sense in more cases.

I think organizations that default to "trust must be earned" for individuals are starting with a mildly toxic default stance that tends to self-perpetuate distrust.

I think people tend to behave far more trustworthy when treated with trust, than when treated with skepticism.

I believe people tend toward living up to the trust you place in them.

[chiefalchemist]

> I default to trusting, but quickly withdraw that trust if it is violated. Its much harder to earn back the trust you had for free at the beginning.

That's the point, trust, real trust is earned. It needs to be earned back. It needs to be earned to begin with. Your default isn't actually Trust. It's a self-serving experiment of "What happens if I allow my self to be venerable?" That's not the same as actual Trust. It's only a convenient proxy. But it's a mistake - and it happens all the time - to confuse it as being Trust.

[JohnFen]

> I think that's more a reflection on the current state of the world rather than an invariable fact of life

I don't think that's a new thing at all. It's how it's been for as far back as we have historical records.

[snickell]

I am curious what life experience or realization has led you to conclude "unearned trust isn't trust" as a basic life principle?

[chiefalchemist]

It's a Life 101 Rule. I don't make the rules. I simply observed the number of times Trust went wrong and noticed the pattern...Trust wasn't earned. And from that, well it wasn't trust then.

Along the same lines, what happens when Trust is loss. More importantly, once it's lost what needs to happen? To get it back it needs to be earned.

I'm confident that if you watch closely, you'll come to the same conclusion.

[hooverd]

Ok, serious question, did you grow up in a low income environment?

[loa_in_]

Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.

I have evaluated possible outcomes and mistrust by default is one of the biggest thorns of modern world. It seems okay because everyone's doing it, but it leaves everyone hurt including the person applying it as a rule.