[Micoloth]

I agree with the Functional style part, but hardly disagree with your second point.

Because of the fact that, keeping comments over blocks of code in sync with the code below requires the same exact amount of effort (arguably less) as keeping function names (and ideally, documentation) in sync with the code inside..

Except that, if the second one is not done, that is a lot more dangerous than the first- exactly because, every time you define a function, you are declaring an abstraction, and if the abstraction changes silently, that's where the real mess begins.

That's what ends up happening in my experience. (See also sibling other comments about the proliferation of flags in a function signature)

(Needless to say, I strongly resonated with the OP as I also love linear code with comments, but in the end it's also a matter of taste..)